Pictures

Found pictures of my river rafting experience. It is fun. If anyone wants to go, I recommend it. :)

These are my friends I went with to Sungai Tampak, Perak. Nurul, NAdz, Azlee, Andy, Ruf, Myself, Ruf's sis (can't seem to remember her name) and Nor.







This is us being gung ho before the actually rafting. We had to carry our own rafts to the river below.

Stuck at a rapid.

The end of the rafting. All in one piece. Happy and grinning. 10km of hard paddling. Arms sore.


My certificate. Ain't that cool. :)

Bored

So bored. I thought I could enjoy the MCs but this is sheer boredom. What good is a break from school when I can't do anything? This is so sad. A Saturday and I spent my day watching TV. At least LOST is good. But after 5 hours of the series, it is just too much tv. I need to run, play ball, skate or do something. Something that gets the heart pumping and adrenalin rushing. I know, I know, no vigorous exercise, yadda, yadda yadda...

What can a gal do? There is only so much tv watching and book reading I can do before I permanantly get lost in the world of imagination and escapism. Even then, I get a headache when I leave reality behind far too long. Sleep, too much. I am tired of sleeping. I get daymares and it just means that it is not a proper sleep and I wake up grouchy and moody. Then at night, I can't sleep.

Sheesh! so much energy but can't use it. Everybody's asleep in the house. It is so quiet. EEEEKS! I just want to scream. Why can't they give me drugs or something that makes me drowsy and forces me to sleep most of the time. At least they can be sure I won't do anything vigorous. I am going crazy. How long does it take for stitches to get healed anyway. I am sure it is healed already. Sigh, double sigh, triple sigh...this is torture.

Maybe I should plan what I am going to do for the rest of the year. I read in Shape magazine that if the ring finger is longer than the index finger, it means that one is a better driver. This is due to the level of testosterone that one has at birth...or something along that line. Well, my ring fingers are longer than my index fingers. Maybe that should renew my faith to take up driving sometime at the end of the year. That would make a whole lot of people happy. Why they bother about me and driving, I am not too sure. But, I highly doubt that i will take up driving. I will just panic on the road or something and plus I do so enjoy being driven.

Oh god, I am just rambling on about unrelated stuff. This is majorly boring. It is times like this that I am starting to think that my aunts do have a point. It is time I find me a man. At least I have someone to talk to when I am bored, angry, moody or whatever. Okie, this is X rated for all my students. R(A) 21. So scoot, no more reading. Go on, read and I will make your life miserable. Last warning....Oh heck... this is my space. I have to get back to the dating scene soon. Oh help, that would not be so easy. Malay men are just so ... so .. so ... what's the word, oh yeah, typical and boring. Of course, Sohabahs excluded. :) Typically boring. What happened to vision-mission men? They are not interested in marriage and I think they are not interested in malay gals. Ay, that's the rub. A string of family weddings coming up pretty soon. My cousins are marrying gals who are younger than me. A younger gal cousin is getting married in December. Nagging aunts galore. Heehhee. At least they are concerned, adorable aunts. :) Hah! maybe I could spend the rest of my medical leave planning on how to meet guys. That would be a blast! NOT! :/

Maybe I should just break the rules and go skating....

My boys

Went to watch the C boys softball match at Montfort. There, I realized the wisdom of taking MCs seriously. At home, I am all alert and perky but outside it took a whole lot of energy just to be normal. Quite woozy, fluey, slower and my stitches do hurt.

But, it was all worth it. My boys may have lost and it is the end of nationals for them, but they played well. They fought well from the beginning to the end.

I am immensely proud of them.

surgery blues

I just got home from SGH. Still slightly groggy. I need to sleep but I need to eat too. Not that I am hungry (went without food since 10 last night - 18 hours of no food) but i need to eat in order to take the pain killers. Am waiting for food now.

I am going to have 2 scars. Sigh...don't like scars.

The lady before me had complications and so I waited for so long to go in surgery. The wait helped me clear my nerves a bit. The staff all very nice and they made it all very comfortable. I was very nervous when it was my turn. Trembled slightly at the operation table. Could feel the injection in my hand. But the general anesthetic took care of everything else after that. Next thing I knew, I woke up facing a window. Feotal position and shaking badly. Very, very, very cold. They put some kind of hose that blew hot air into my blankets. Felt better after that. Pain is bearable.

When I took the taxi to SGH in the morning, the driver was very kind. He assured me that everything will be ok. His wife went through it and he understood. It was nice of him. He said that I will get moody after the operation. And yes, I did. But my parents started it. Never ask someone who is still slightly groggy from an operation a battery of questions. You are just going to get frustration and tears.

Anyway, 11 days of MC ... that's the upside. Still, I might not use it all. I only prepared enough until Friday. well, shall see how. I might pop down to school tmr and go Montfort for the match. It all depends on how I am feeling in the morning.

Think I can skip the food. I just want to sleep. Can't stay up anymore.

Uncovering reality

Going for surgery in the morning.

Have you ever had an experience so unpleasant or shocking that you refuse to acknowledge it?This is the very situation. I know for a month now. I refused to even think about it. I won't let it all sink in and accept it. It does not help that school has kept me busy. Sec 4s, tournaments and all.

No time to deal with it. Don't think about it. It won't happen. Wishful thinking. Illogical.

Madam Sim asked why I did not tell her earlier. How could I, when I myself refuse to believe it.

Fear manifests itself in many forms. The most common form of disguise that fear takes is anger. Can't suppress fear. It wants to be heard and dissipate from the source, the person. Covered and hidden, it brews, it breeds, it feeds.

Morning arrives. Going under the knife.

homecoming elections

Went to TKGS yesterday for match. It was nostalgic. Back to my old school. I can see my old classroom at the corner. They had additions to the school. Plenty of changes. Hard to believe it was 10 years since I graduated from TKGS. Moribus Modestus - Demure and Resolute. We were resolute but seriously never demure, until we graduate. All the fence climbing, yakking loudly etc... those were the days. I could practically see ghosts of my younger self and of my friends. It would probably be more nostalgic if I went to the old school building. All the naughty and mischievous things we did as students. I am much naughtier than most of my students. But, I am smart, never get caught. Oh, and our road crossing abilities developed during our TK years. :)

Oh and the TKGS spirit! Do I miss it. TKGS softball girls are aggressive and loud showing what true TKGians are made off. Long live the TK spirit! The cheers they did, very uplifting. We are very good at cheerleading. I so do want to do a cheer.

Anyway, today did a very important thing for the future of our nation. I went for elections training. Yupps, was selected for this upcoming elctions to be on duty. 4 hours training session. All teachers and of course teachers... we are such sociable creatures and so by the end of the session we are all friends. I just realise there are so many teachers living in Bedok Reservoir. So many of us. . Being teachers, we were so into the role play and all. Kind of fun la the hands on session. Too bad I wasn't able to play the role of a wheelchair bound voter.

what happened to the weekend?

Sunday night. Tomorrow school. Sigh. I am tired. I so need to do my work now. Marking, lessons to plan. Can't do it. I really have no energy. Spent most of my weekend asleep. Supposed to do work and all, but there is no energy. My PC is always on as a reminder to do my work but I cannot bring myself to get started. Goodness, I think I am going to break.

This term is one very busy term. Plus with that thing happening in Week 5. Have been too busy to really think about it. Actually, I don't want to think about it, but I have to. Classic ostrich syndrome, as I called it. As long as I don't see/think about it, it is not a problem/it won't happen. Wake up! It is going to happen and you know it.

I am just so down. Emotional rollercoaster. Started with missing Nadz's solemnisation at ROMM. I would have given anything to be there. Of course, I have about 250 teenagers to mould and my conscience just wouldn't allow me. That weighs heavily on my shoulders. Plus, I have to miss a few lessons with my sec 4s in the next few weeks and that makes me feel more terrible. Of course, week 5... why am I not a total ditzy blonde?

I would like to take this opportunity to ask my students not to do things last minute. For example, the test is tomorrow, please try to ask me questions days before the test. Not the day before. I do not mind answering questions but seriously, what good does it do? Especially when the test is on a Monday morning and you are asking me on a Sunday night. It is a bit too late especially if you ask me questions that requires a long explanation. Please call, and don't sms. It is easier to explain long and difficult questions that way. Also do that if you have more than 1 question. Much as I would like to make myself available to my students at all times, I am not always free. I wish the best for all my students and I wish I could be there for all of you at all times but I am only human. Perhaps, this is a good time to give fair warning to my students that I am planning a trip to Chiangmai in September hols. I need a break. I hope it gets approved. I know, prelims is right after the hols, so I am giving you the heads up to ask me questions way before then.

Achin'

Tired. muscles hurt. Still haven't finish doing ppt slides. Had been a looooooooooooooooong day. Stressed out. Tonnes to do. When will it end?

OIC Singapore was good though. Love the musical/dance extravaganza. Glad they got Jacintha to sing the national anthem. She did it beautifully. It was a sophisticated arts affair. Rahimah Rahim was great. Seriously, she has such grace and elegance. Super glad they decided to use veterans in this affair.

So tired, was glued to the tv while marking mind maps. Refused to move. Finally budged out of the sofa. Would have been a good day overall but I was served with a letter from IRAS. Must pay tax! Darn! Am super broke now.

Body achin', heart achin' and pocket achin'!

amazing things in a small world

Didn't eat breakfast for 2 days in a row. Amazing. I seldome ever skipped breakfast, but for 2 days I did. That is saying something. i love breakfast. Always eat a huge one. Went for sports day on an empty stomach and I still had loads of energy. Today went and had tutorial with 4G while stomach growling. Had lunch at home. Quite a treat we had today. I ate yesterday's leftovers cos my mum was too sick to cook and then my father came home and he brought Indian Rojak! So had a huge lunch to make up for today.

I took taxi home from school today. A waste of money but no choice cos I was tired and loads of stuff to carry. What luck I flagged down my neighbour's taxi. At that time both of us didn't know we are neighbours. It was only after the driver asked which block I stayed then he said he lives in the same block. We talked some and he said something that made me so ashamed of myself. Told him I took taxi cos I have so many books to bring home and mark. And he said he understands cos he knows my father and my father is not an extravagant man. So he is sure that I am not extravagant as well. Boy, I was silent for a while. Not very nice to contradict him. I am not extravagant but the amount of taxis I take.... actually, I have a theory. My father never spend much money on us while we grow up. Always very basic and loads of hand me downs. No toys, no games, just that one Scrabble he bought for me when i was in Pri 5 because I reasoned that it is an educational game and that the whole family can play together. And that camera in Pri 3 because I made a deal with him that he will get me a camera if I get 1st place. We were very understanding, he is the eldest of 10 siblings, some of my uncles and auties were still schooling when I was very young. So he had to help his family. We made do without a lot of things. No complains, grew up fine after all. But, now that I have my own money, I want to buy things that had been denied from me. So, Aussino, branded T shirts etc...but then again, I wouldn't call it extravagant since I live within my means and I dont buy a whole lot of branded or expensive stuff. Still...think i should cut down on taxis. I spend quite a bit on taxis each month....

Extravagant is this certain someone I know who earns very little but she changed her hp every few months and she spend hundreds each time she changed it. Nvm...don't wish to talk about her. She is totally taking advantage of the situation.

Anyway, the taxi driver who happens to be my neighbour refuses to except payment from me. So I got a free ride. Yaay. What a nice day it had been.

Going to go out with sohabahs later. Can't wait.

on teachers

Sports day. Won third place for EL dept in 4X100 relay race. Not too bad for someone who hasn't run since God knows when. There was a crazy teacher who was cheering away at the grandstand. The only teacher crazy enough to do that. Cheering away for Softball, of course. Crazy. No other teacher bothered to cheer for anybody. ;p

Lunch at BK. Talked about students, books, Tom Cruise and dirty stuff. (Ms Zarinah!!! dirty stufff????)

We also talked on the way to BK about the lack of awareness of students. ;)

Facts on teachers:
Teachers do not live in staff room. We have homes to go back to.
Teachers read other books too. We do not read only textbooks.
Teachers have dreams, ambitions and hobbies. We do not just teach.
Teachers were given birth to, nurtured, went to school and we were once your age (gasp!).
Teachers do not just materialise out of air, all grown up and ready to teach.
Teachers have feelings. (yes, we do. So watch it!)
Teachers who are not married are still entitled to 5 day work week - we have parents to spend our weekends with.
Teachers do not disappear on the days they don't teach you. So please hand in your homework.
Believe it or not, teachers do get tired, teachers do not like to scold, teachers do not know everything (if we are omniscient, we are demi-Gods), teachers watch movies, teachers are also capable to hold a conversation about movies, celebs and things other than school related matter. Teachers are human beings.

Wow! what a revalation about teachers. :)

Cats 'n' such

Cat's sick. He's been home all day for the past few days. He is never home when well. Actually he is not our cat, he is just a cat that we feed and share our space with. He treats us like a restaurant, hotel and hospital roll into one. I swear that cat is much more intelligent than we give him credit for. I mean, what other cat actually devised a cat sharing sytem? Seriously, this cat put us in a cat sharing sytem and did not tell us. We thought we were the only ones who feed and pet him. Apparently he has been going to my neighbours too. And we only found out by accident. Plus, that cat knows Malay. He understands everything we say to him! But, in all fairness, he likes us the best. Why else would he treat us like a convenient convalescence resident or a resort?

7 cats since I was 7 and out of all these 7, only 2 was rescued by me to it from the life of a stray cat. All others were smart enough to appear at our doorstep begging for food. Then they keep coming everyday for food, and everyday they get bolder and then one day we would find that stray cat sleeping on the sofa. They have claimed us as their family. We are stuck with them. No arguments about it. Don't know why though, being my family's pet ain't an easy life. Sure we feed them but my mum and I are perfect Almiras from Animaniacs. We squeeze and cuddle and kiss our cats till they beg for mercy or scratch or bite, whichever is more convenient. Still they love us and these cats kept coming.

Too bad these cats are regular pariahs, would love a British long hair. And only 1 cat was female. All others male. Tom cats are terrible. They don't like cuddles and kisses. Tabies are much more loving. As I type this, that cat is sleeping on the bed, making a bloody mess on the sheets.